Along with tens of millions of others, I too watched the Super Bowl on Sunday night. And while it’s 2:11am on Wednesday morning, I’m compelled to write a quick summary of what I think is such a strange dichotomy of the Super Bowl vs. our real life.
First…
Yes, I am a Niners fan.
Yes, I cheered, booed, yelled, and hollered during the game.
Yes, I liked the Paul Harvey / Dodge Ram ad (even though I’m skeptical it’ll sell one more truck because of it).
Yes, I was bummed we lost.
But here’s the dysfunction and dichotomy of the Super Bowl vs. Real Life.
Millions of people were radically charged up Sunday screaming at their TVs over an event that likely has zero significance to their everyday life. And now this week, we resume our day-to-day lives for which so many of us have less enthusiasm than we do a Super Bowl game.
Know what gets me really fired up?
Seeing code get deployed and the product into beta where we can see transactions occurring through the gateway
Watching someone kill it on a project or initiative where they outperformed even high expectations
Tracking a record number of shipments out the door, or a record number of purchases made online
Experiencing the chemistry and creativity of a team thinking through a new initiative, campaign, or strategy
It’s not that I don’t like the Super Bowl, or football for that matter. I played through college, though it was only D3 ball…and there’s a story in there which I think it has to do with why I overcompensate in other parts of my life; despite decent skills, I could’ve been a much better ball player than I was. I just didn’t take it seriously enough, as evidenced by the fact that I’m in better shape now in my late 30’s than I was at 21. But I still dig football, and think there’s some good lessons even in watching and cheering. It’s fun, there’s camaraderie, and that’s all cool.
But not as a substitute for our own pursuits and figuring out ways we can go and kill it ourselves. Watching someone do something great can be an awesome catalyst to our own life, so I’m not railing on the event–it’s simply a surreal illustration to me.
I wish all of us in everyday life were as fired up about something–work, philanthropy, their own personal challenge–as they are a game over which they have little to zero participation, and the outcome of which has negligible to no impact on their everyday life.
I’ve been in too many meetings over the years where I’ve seen some people vigorously debate an event, discussion, project, or strategy, only to hear a concluding team of people end by muttering “why are they taking this so seriously?”
Oh, you mean, more seriously than a football game? For something that they’re passionate about, and has meaning to their life, to their future and responsibilities for which they’re accountable?
Pray tell, I wish more people had that level of vigor, fight, and energy in everyday life. And if you’re one of them, don’t ever lose it. Ever.
It’s part of your gift.
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If you are reading this far 🙂 , I’d suggest listening to this song, the Long Road Home by Mickey Newbury. Maybe as you read this. Or not. It’s a great song. In iTunes you can see how many times you have played a certain song, and I can’t even bring myself to say how many times I have listened to a good dozen songs in my “most played.” It also probably serves as more accurate confirmation of a DSM-IV diagnosis of a bit of an obsessive/compulsive personality. The Long Road Home got some good play time on my road trip. It’s mesmerizing.
Ten minutes to start, and I think that bathroom line is longer than ten minutes…
I left Tucson on Saturday morning to head over to Phoenix for the Rock ‘n Roll Marathon. Checking into marathons is a great feeling, there is a type of impending human kinetic energy. Can’t quite explain it. Closest I have felt to it is when I used to work as an Exec at a Company where we’d have big events, sometimes thousands of people, at annual conventions. I think it’s the feeling of pulling together enthusiastic people who share a passion. You can feel it. One thing I hate is apathy. Being around passionless people exhausts and annoys me to no end. It’s part of why I love NYC so much. For better or worse, there is a ton of passion there. So I’m drawn to people who are passionate.
I was hanging out at the pool in the afternoon the day before the race finishing the Steve Jobs biography and trying to stay off my legs and save up my energy. I met this guy there whose wife was a professional competitor, and she was running in the half the following day. Super nice guy, 50’s, could tell he was really hard working and at one point in the conversation he told me: “I’m not gaining on the world, but the world isn’t gaining on me either–so I think I’m doing okay.”
And it made me think of the last three gas station attendants on my trip up to that point, Nick, Walter, and Bao. And it’s funny that I remember their names, because I’m not great at names. I talked to Nick from Chevron for a bit, and learned he’s worked two 40-hour a week jobs for the last 12 years. His other gig is at a grocery store. Respectable. Hard work. Good man. I have a soft spot for the “working class” (a term I don’t love but it’s the most descriptive).
Start of the Phoenix Marathon
You’re an Executive? Cool, good for you big shot. Maybe you’re really good. Maybe you’re lucky. But I know that however hard you worked, you got a lot of breaks along the way–a lot of breaks that other people didn’t get.
However, you clean houses or offices for a living? You have my respect.
Because, THAT is a hard job. An honorable job. And the people in those jobs, well, they’re the ones that are the fabric of America, and what makes it great. It’s not that I have a rant against people who have been successful with big fancy titles, I don’t. But them being successful doesn’t make them any more respectable than a person in a more typical American job.
Seeing the States was a reminder why I have come to be so frustrated with politics, mostly the politicians themselves. Because, most of them forgot who and what makes this country so amazing. I’m doing my best not to editorialize, but during my trip I was really reminded of the people who truly make America what it is. There are days I’m convinced we’d be better off if we simply replaced all of Congress with 535 rational, hardworking middle class Americans who care deeply about this country.
Anyways, back to the road trip…Sunday morning I awoke around 4:30am, excited and nervous. Ready to try hard, but I gave myself an out to bail if I felt horrible during the run. Race gun sounded at 7:50am, and we were off.
During the run I had two particularly memorable moments. The first one was an unknown-to-me person by the name of Jackie, and either there were a ton of women named Jackie running this race, or one REALLY popular one. This guy holding this sign I must’ve seen seven times during my run, and I saw a lot of other Jackie signs on the way. It made me feel good for two reasons, one is to watch a team of people so enthusiastic cheering someone on was simply fun to see. The other good feeling was because I saw all the people standing with the signs waiting for her, therefore, I was clearly running ahead of whoever-this-Jackie-woman was. I try to take the small victories along the way. 🙂
Go Jackie Go!
The other great moment was running next to this guy for the first ten miles who was carrying the American flag. Seeing the sun streaking through the flag, with him running intently, gave me goosebumps, which I don’t get often. It was one of the best moments of the marathon, perhaps even better than finishing.We live in such an amazing country. Post race I saw him and thanked him for running with the flag, but what I really wanted to do was hug it out with him. Can’t explain how cool it was, I have chills even as I write this. It was magic.
American Flag marathon runner
From what I have read, what usually happens with newbie marathoners is first 10 miles are cake, 11-18 are fine, then somewhere around 18-20 you hit the wall and then, well, welcome to hell. That was pretty much my experience in my first marathon six weeks ago.
Mile 25…
What happened in the Phoenix marathon was unexpected. I had the stomach flu then followed by either a wicked cold or the regular flu (there should be some law of physiology that the two can’t accompany each other) starting a week before the race. So the first 15 miles I felt pretty lousy. Then, at mile 15, something happened. It just clicked. And I felt great. My pace picked up considerably. And it lasted until I got to mile 23.5, where I finally bonk’d (hit the wall) but when you bonk that far along it’s a lot easier to complete. My time was 3:55:24, so I was thrilled to finish this one given how I’d been feeling, getting sub-four was just a bonus.
Post run, I went and saw a few friends from my high school back in Columbus, Ohio. Great people. I loved hearing their stories, experiences, and travels from over the years. I never tire of meeting, and listening to interesting people. Mike and Julie, hope to see you guys again on another Arizona trip…
And after a few hours of chatting over burgers, truffle fries, and (one) beer–my big cheat meal for the week–I was off to hit the road to continue my trek on I-10 west into the sunset. And back into California, 3,500 miles later.
Why’d I drive from Florida to California? Because I have a car affliction.
But, what prompted my car buying affliction in Florida was, in part, the prospect of driving across the Country. Because I knew that during my trip I’d learn a little bit more about myself. A lot more about others. A few great life lessons along the way.
And, that I’d fall in love with America all over again.
And I did.
Off into the sunset…
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I made it to Tucson, Arizona on Wednesday evening, and I pretty much caught up my highlight events from the first leg of my road trip with this post here. Though, I’m adding a a few more pics to the below “Part Two” even though they were from the first leg because they were fun parts of the adventure for me. I stayed in Tucson at the Tanque Verde Guest Ranch for three nights, it’s a great place and during my time there I tried to recover from this nasty bug using DayQuil, desert air, and sleep. Though I was also able to get some work done on a few various start-up projects, and I had an absolute breakthrough in terms of writing a book that’s been lingering for five years.
Being in Tucson was a reminder of a realization I’ve had in the last year about building and running companies. In hiring, lots is discussed about identifying and assessing competencies. Little is discussed in the way of chemistry. However, when I hire, those are the two things I’m looking for. Competency AND chemistry. Generally in equal measure, because I think chemistry is as important as competency, and was reminded of this during my stay at the ranch. The ranch is the same as it was in years past, but the staff is different this time. And it made a huge difference in the feel of the whole venue. That’s what chemistry does. When I ran a start-up in NYC/NJ a few years back, this was one of my big takeaways. The team was good, really competent. But the chemistry was great. And it was a difference-maker. Seeing Tanque Verde with some great chemistry among the staff really reminded me about this, and it’s a lesson I’ll never forget.
Bulletproof glass at the boiled peanut gas station
Okay, one last Florida story! It’s not my fault, the state is just SO chalk full of craziness…So if you know me, you know I LOVE boiled peanuts. Made a stop at a Florida gas station based on a Google query, it was in a rough–and I mean rough–neighborhood. When I walked in, there were bars over every possibly entry, and when I entered the cashier was sitting behind bullet proof glass (this picture–no exaggeration).
So as I’m loading up my boiled peanut containers (which are not Paleo, by the way–a peanut is a legume, so it’s a cheat meal if you’re going to splurge) a very large man wearing a tank top and a bandana barged into the store and suddenly yelled:“Alright everybody, put yo’ hands up and git yo’ asses on the floor!”
Then, just about after enough time elapsed for everybody to wet their pants, he laughed and said “Just kidding ya’ll”. Thank you, sir, for sharing your gift of hilarity this evening…
This story further adds to my I love/hate Florida repertoire. I love Florida because you can get boiled peanuts at a gas station. I hate Florida because you can get a fake hold up whilst getting those boiled peanuts at a gas station.
Preservation Hall
This was in New Orleans, at Preservation Hall in the French Quarter. There are three shows a night, no photos allowed during the performance. Here’s what I LOVED about watching these guys play jazz. Not only is the venue steeped rich in history and legacy, but these guys LOVED what they were doing. I looked at their clothes, some of them looked as if they were wearing recycled second-hand stuff. And there’s nothing wrong with that, but I realized if I were to see one of these guys at a gas station and judge him by well worn clothes I’d probably assume he was either not successful or not doing something of significance. And I’d be wrong on both counts. Each of those guys were more successful than me, and following something with a passion that I yearn to replicate. Watching them play was like watching magic unfold.
The Amazing Teri Baker!
This is a pic with Teri Baker, a great person who used to be on my team at a former Company. She ran the Call Center, but did a lot more than that too. She’s got a lot of heart, and I have always admired that about her. Teri happened to be in Austin as I was driving through, so we caught up over Stubb’s BBQ. So much fun. She is, as they say, great people.
Sunset at Tanque Verde Ranch in Tucson, Arizona
This was the view from my room at Tanque Verde Ranch at sunset with a field full of saguaro cacti, which are truly amazing. And it’s equally amazing what an Instagram filter can do to your pictures. I posted this one on IG and was contacted by some Arizona online magazine who wanted to make it their photo of the day. I was pretty excited, until I saw I basically have more IG followers than they do (which is not a lot).
I love the desert, and the saguaro are simply spectacular. It’s generally hard for me to sit still, but it’s different in Arizona. I think this is one of my favorite states. And in Arizona, while I love Tucson, I really think Sedona is exceptional. I could get lost there. Figuratively.
Of course, if I were using Apple Maps in Sedona, I could get lost there literally too.
Happy Horses post-trail ride
I love this photo because it was taken after all the horses got back from an afternoon ride and they seem genuinely happy, like they know they just did a good job. There’s an amazing sense of satisfaction in hard work.
I’m not sure if there’s such a thing as an anaphylactic allergy with horses, but I think I come pretty close. I’m ridiculously allergic. Therefore, I would make a terrible cowboy. And I don’t even really like horses that much. Though I do like wearing a cowboy hat and boots. Just, keep the horses away from me. And lasso’s. I probably shouldn’t be near those either.
Endless fires at the ranch
I checked into Tanque Verde on a Wednesday night, and left Saturday morning. During that entire time, I had a fire going from the moment I arrived until the moment I left–as well all through the night, and would wake up to throw more logs on the fire to keep it going.
For someone that has a hard time sitting still, I did pretty good at it at the ranch–but the fires help, they’re mesmerizing. So the big breakthrough I had while in Tucson was with this book I’ve been struggling to finish. I started it almost seven years ago, and should’ve finished it five years ago. Going into this week I was probably 70% “done.” The problem was, I hated it. Every time I opened the document to work on it, I just didn’t like it. The writing, structure, order, voice. There’s little I liked about it. It has been 70% done for years.
So this week, I started over. Completely over. Brand new document. Didn’t carry over one word from the last one (though I’m sure as I write more, stuff will carry over). I started and finished the first chapter on this new take, and for the first time I feel like I’ve got some of my book writing mojo back. I’m not sure what the lesson in this is, I mean surely it can’t be when things are hard just ditch ’em and start over. But at the same time, maybe with some things, you do…
Anyways, this was THE breakthrough for me this week on the road trip (so far). If I hadn’t lost myself with the scenes of the southwest outside and the crackling fireplace inside, away from all internet connectivity and my Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/emails/surfing/texting and all other distractions, I’m not sure I would have ever had the realization that to get to where I wanted to go, I’d have to break free from what I’d done.
I also realized that I have to unplug my life more. Yes, many of you have been telling me, and encouraging me, to do this for years. I know, and you were right. But I just had to learn it for myself. Sometimes telling someone (repeatedly) to do something doesn’t quite work. It MIGHT even have the opposite effect with SOME individuals. 🙂
Okay, I officially want to be a Cowboy
If I wouldn’t be so terrible at it, I’d want to be a Cowboy when I grow up and work at a ranch. And write. As well as play the guitar. I’d like to be able to sing, too. Okay, let’s switch this up. I want to be a country music singer that has enough money to go to a ranch on occasion and play cowboy. Alas, I get to play Executive and consume copious amounts of Allegra and point at, instead of ride, horses. I am not even a City Slicker. I’m a City Sniffler. Ugh.
1970 VW Hippie Bus
In college I had one of these for a few months. It was not my favorite car. It was in the family for a while, I didn’t drive it long. Compared to the guy in the Jag in my earlier post, this guy did NOT look like he was having fun. Because, after all, I do not think cruising at 45 in a 75 with puffs of black smoke willowing out the tail pipe constitutes fun.
On my way from Tucson to Phoenix, I actually passed this guy three times (had to stop twice on the way). And it wasn’t because I was speeding. When I looked over at the guy I could practically see him standing on the gas pedal, and kinda rocking his body forward as if he were trying to give it some momentum.
Only if you owned and drove a VW Bus at some point in your life would you even understand this…
Raz at the Phoenix Marathon Expo check in, number 53496
When I got to Phoenix I checked into the hotel and hit up the Rock ‘n Roll Marathon Expo at the convention center. My number is 53496, the 5 was cut off by my RFID timer. Given this sickness I’ve been fighting for ten days, I have seriously been debating whether to show up for the race, and if I did show up whether to simply switch to the half marathon or to go ahead and try to finish the full.
I decided to try to run the full marathon, partly because physically I feel back up to 80% now, and partly because if I didn’t run at all I’d always wonder if I could’ve finished. I’m going to try my best to have a solid run tomorrow, but I’m also trying to be somewhat aware of my body and recovery and not push it too hard. In retrospect, it was a little overzealous to do this six weeks after my first marathon. One of my future posts will be a “Lessons Learned in Marathoning.”
Since being in Phoenix I’ve read and seen some super inspirational stories about marathoners, including one guy in particular with multiple sclerosis. One of the things I love about running is drawing on inspiration from other people. And it’s usually from observation more than hearing some story, but both work.
I still remember so vividly running in Central Park this summer and a guy with an artificial leg was pacing alongside me, and I just found it breathtaking. Not in a I-feel-sorry-for-you type of way. No, in a you-inspire-me type of way. And, that’s one of the many gifts of running.
Ciao, for now. I’ll complete my third and final leg of this blog in a day or two when I get back to Cali.
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This weekend I started the trip west, from Naples Florida. I’m driving. I flew to Florida, expecting to buy a ticket back to California at some point in January, but because I have a bad habit, I mean affliction, strong enthusiasm for cars and road trips, I am driving home. Tonight I made it into Tucson and am staying at the Tanque Verde Ranch for a few nights until I head to Phoenix this weekend for the Rock ‘n Roll marathon this Sunday.
Before leaving for my road trip back West, RoZo got their ears pierced. They were pretty excited as you can tell. Me? Ahhhhhh, well…I warmed up to the idea, eventually.
Two weeks ago I had an aggressive time goal for the Phoenix marathon, but the stomach flu accompanied by a nasty cold for the last week has kept me from running for over a week. Based on how I feel tonight, I’m not even sure yet if I’ll make it to the starting line, let alone the finish line. Regardless, I’ve enjoyed my trip. And there are few things that I love more than traveling across the United States. It’s not just the road trip that I enjoy, but it’s the people you meet along the way.
Here’s a pictorial of my trip and a few highlights from the past few days.
First, let’s cover Florida. If you’ve heard people talk about a harrowing life experience or ever had one yourself, like an imminent traffic accident, you will often hear that they talk about how time slows down. Well, it’s actually true in a way. The human eye and mind can process about 20 frames per second. However, under duress in acute situations we can actually boost output to about 60 frames per second–so it feels like time slows down, but you’re just able to process faster than normal for short periods of time.
Basically, this is what I feel like when I enter the gulf coast of Florida. Like I am able to operate at 60 frames a second, but ongoing. It is more likely, however, that I am simply operating at a very normal 20 frames per second and the state is operating at 10. 🙂
I like the pace here, it’s relaxing. And there are some amazing people, too. Plus, the billboards are hysterical. This is the state of funny (and abundant) billboards. I could do a whole blog series on the billboards with various witty captions. I also learned North Florida is a hidden gem, I like it because it feels like the real south to me–the foliage is gorgeous, a bit more temperate, easy to find boiled peanuts, and the people are very real and authentic. It needs a rebranding though, like let’s give it the panache it deserves. Maybe take a page out of the playbook of SF and NYC, you know Soma, NoHo, SoHo, TriBeca, Nolita.
So here it is: NorFlor. Give it a whirl, Governor Scott. No attribution needed. Rebrand. Watch the revenues rain. Thank me later.
Following a few of my pictorial highlights from my trip so far, the Long Road Home.
With as many billboards as this guy has in Florida, you’d think the whole state were infertile at this point. I love his hair. Therefore, I love his billboards. Pretty much how I roll.
Basically the Apple Maps directions go down like this: “Hang a left here, go about 2,500 miles, hang a right onto I-5 for 500 more miles. You should see your house on the left. Or is that a cliff? Good luck, let us know if you make it!”
Even my watch is nagging me along the way, knowing I haven’t run in a week. If you are a runner, you should seriously take a look at this Nike watch w/ the TomTom built in. It’s fantastic. My Amazon affiliate link is here: (kidding, obviously). It’s a great watch.
In Alabama, not only are dogs allowed to drive, but they can also order and pick up at the drive through. This guy needs a haircut, though. I am worried about his forward visibility. Opposable thumbs. I’m also worried that he lacks opposable thumbs, too. However, I saw him using Google Maps. So he’s probably in better shape than me.
New Orleans. The city where nobody understand the term “protein style.” And nobody seemed to appreciate all my menu substitutions. There are two Paleo-friendly things to consume in New Orleans. 1. Oysters. 2. Water. That’s it. Everything else is fried. These are Beignet’s from Cafe Dumonde. Ironically enough–and this is true–the morning AFTER I ate these was the first day in my LIFE that I started to see definition in my abdominal muscles. But they went away by the time I made it to Stubb’s BBQ in Austin…Sigh.
On the way out of New Orleans I went to Mother’s, one of my fave restaurants in the U.S. This is where normal, real, down to earth people eat. Yes, on occasion I like fancy restaurants. But nine out of ten times give me a place like Mother’s–real food and real people–and I’m thrilled.
This is the greatest BBQ that I have never eaten in my life. I love this little place, and someday I will come back–because Coopers doesn’t serve at 7am (when I stumbled into it). But check it out, how could you NOT stop here? This place would turn even the most devout vegan, even if just for one meal. I love kitschy ambiance, these guys were intentional about what they built here. It’s adorable. That’s what “feel” does. I love the food, and haven’t even tasted it yet.
Driving through New Mexico I saw this cool vintage Jaguar XKE with the sunset bouncing off of it as she was hustling down the highway. Looked like they were having a great time. I love cars. Especially those with classic design, the XKE is one sexy automobile.
Have you ever driven through West Texas? Nobody is there. Except State Troopers. This guy welcomed me into the second half of Texas. I had no good excuse for speeding, so instead I tried logic. Basically, the conversation went down like this: “Officer, let’s just ignore how bad the real numbers look for a second and examine this situation using percentages, okay? If I were doing 46.5 in a 40, would you give me a ticket? Of course not, that would be silly. Therefore, wouldn’t you also agree, Officer, that it would be equally silly to give me a ticket for going 93 in an 80?” He didn’t appear amused. However, I don’t think he was really grasping the concept…That’s the problem when you don’t apply ratios to your life, your mind gets disjointed and you make emotional–rather than logical–decisions. 🙂
Finally, made it to Tanque Verde Ranch in Tucson, Arizona where I’m camping for two nights and then to Phoenix where I hope I’ll be able to give the marathon a shot this weekend depending on how I feel. Tonight, I’ve caught up on some writing, did this blog entry whilst listening to country music, and thought about another screenplay that I’ll probably never write. But someday if I had a writing getaway, perhaps…
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Literally hours after I posted yesterday these two commitments, I met this awesome marathon coach/trainer at the CIM Expo and was asking her advice on the run today, what products to take, what to eat for breakfast, and how to pace myself for a sub four hour marathon. She was so helpful and encouraging, yet when I told her about my goal pace she asked about my training distances and times to date (which I exaggerated slightly to try to help my cause). She looked at me and said “look, I don’t want to discourage you–but there’s no way you’re going to be able to do that pace based on your previous runs and training, especially with the rain and wind tomorrow–it’s supposed to be brutal. Just try to finish this one, I want to make sure you can finish.”
Raz at 4am marathon day, pretty scary hair!
This morning I caught the 5am bus, and who sits next to me? An ultra marathoner, and one of the pacers for the Sacramento marathon today. So she asks my goal, and I tell her to finish and then my stretch is a sub-four. She asks me the same line of questioning as the marathon coach last night, and based on my responses says “I don’t want to see you discouraged, but you can’t get close to four hours based on your prep. Even if you had a chance, everyone today is going to be off their target pace considerably because of the weather, the winds are gusting up to 40 MPH. Just focus on finishing this one, do your next one for time.” She really was awesome and full of helpful advice and super encouraging, and she was just being realistic.
But sometimes I hate reality. And a lot of times you can bend it.
It was like I was getting taunted, especially after my affirmations yesterday. Two really experienced marathoners, both telling me getting anywhere close to my goal was impossible. This happens to all of us in everyday life. And it’s so so so easy to succumb. Sometimes the wisdom makes sense to heed. Today, for me, it didn’t.
And this is what I know about myself: sometimes I need people to say “Hey dude, I believe in you” and other times all I need is a person–or two–to tell me at “There is NO WAY you can pull this off!” (incidentally, thanks to those who read my post yesterday and sent me kind messages).
So, I said screw it. I’m trying anyways. First to finish, then for a sub four hour marathon.
And here goes my first mile:
Starting line: wind howling, it’s raining sideways, I’m wearing a trash bag. It’s in the 50’s and I’m freezing. Soaking wet. And excited. Oh, and I’m sick with a head cold. 🙂
Rich Razgaitis Just off Bus (video at the starting line of some CRAZY wind and rain going on, gusts up to 40 MPH)
At 0.1 miles, I get pretty emotional–yes, the teary kind. Ridiculous, I know, but three years ago I had two failed marathon attempts, 18-months ago I couldn’t run due to this nagging tendonitis, and four months ago I was starting my Sacramento marathon training with three mile runs at an 11-12 minute pace. Today I KNEW I was finishing a marathon. It was a bit of emotional overload. Oh, and the National Anthem was playing. That always does it to me, too. I am so in love with America.
At 0.4 miles, I throw up.
At 0.75 miles, I have to pee. Already. And waited in line for 90-seconds to do so (these 90-seconds become critical later).
Jitters, anyone? I start to settle in after that first mile.
So I’m running about a 9:12 pace the first half of the race. A sub four hour marathon is a 9:09 pace. So I was tracking close, but it was also only the first half and I was still fresh.
The second half I pick it up a tad, but I’m getting fairly fatigued. At 20 miles my legs are bloody screaming. At this point it’s mostly mental. Your body is begging at you to stop, slow down, or keel over. Each step feels like knives in your legs. And I keep thinking, if I just get to 23 or 24 it’ll be easier. Actually, it doesn’t. The reverse is true, it gets massively harder for each mile beyond the high teens. At mile 23 I debate making another (my fifth or sixth!) potty break, and opt to take the 35-seconds to stop. It’s about this time that I also finally ditch wearing the trash bag, as the rain and wind finally subsided and the sun starts to peek out.
Miles 24 and 25 feel eternal. But it’s a strange feeling of excruciating pain coupled with elation, because I knew I was going to finish, and my pace was improving–I was running 8:30 miles at this point, but wasn’t sure this would be enough to get me below four hours.
Raz at Mile 25 of Sacramento Marathon
26.2 miles later, I cross the finish line and my NikePlus tells me I finished in four hours and four seconds. But I thought I’d started the NikePlus early, and that the chip would show a faster time. Alas, this afternoon I learned my chip time was four hours and 33 seconds, which is about a 9:10/mile pace. I needed a 9:09/mile pace to finish under four hours.
33-seconds over four-hours. So. Stinking. Close.
California Marathon Finish Line
I’m still thrilled. I finished and I chased a time-based goal that a lot of people told me I couldn’t come close to accomplishing today–and got pretty dang near to it in tough conditions. I had a blast. I learned a lot about myself in the process. I accomplished something that’s been evading me for years. And I was inspired by thousands of other runners in the process.
And I got a great reminder that at times you’ve just got to say “screw it” in the face of rational advice or things that seem to difficult. A lot of times you know in your heart what’s possible, and you’ve got to go for it, even when others tell you that it’s impossible.
Finally, I really want to express special thanks to all of those who have supported or encouraged me in the process of my first marathon, there were many of you along the way–from helping me pick the race and designing the training schedule, to various encouragement and checking in throughout, I’ll forever be grateful.
Raz Just Across Sac Marathon Finish Line
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doc. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all time. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good heartiness, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Tomorrow is the Sacramento marathon (also known as California Marathon, or CIM).
I am not really a runner. Yet, I love to run. The solidtude. Steps on the ground in a rhythmic pattern. Letting your mind wander. The runners rush after a good jaunt. I just wasn’t built to be a long distance runner. But that hasn’t quelled my enthusiasm for it.
I have two prior (failed) Marathon attempts, both three years ago. Midway through my training I got some pretty harsh tendonitis that benched me. A little over a year ago I sought out a highly regarded Orthopedic surgeon who I was sure could get me back into running. After my evaluation, he told me his best advice was to lay low a year, possibly two, do light stretching and exercises—maybe aquatic!—but to do nothing running related. Was basically a lot of “you know, tendonitis is tricky…not great blood flow there, slow to repair, there’s just really not a lot you can do…” Upon my request he reluctantly made a physical therapist recommendation. I still remember how hopeless I felt leaving his office.
Instead (of basically doing nothing) I found a physical therapist who got me jump started. I remember on my first visit asking him if he could help me run again, with the end goal being a marathon. With some optimism he said yes. Part of what I needed was some physical help, and he used an amazing (and painful—like bring-you-to-tears-painful) technique called Graston Therapy that made a huge difference. But he also gave me some hope.
So fast forward 1+ years, I’ve now been training for the Sac Marathon for four months, supplemented with Crossfit a few days a week, and have been following the Paleo diet consistently and have dropped a few pounds. At worst, I am in decent shape. But even still, I’m lacking confidence for tomorrow.
So up until this moment, I have given myself an out for tomorrow’s race so that if I don’t finish I’m okay with it. And myself.
In other words, I’ve set myself up to be okay with failing. Which is not really like me at all, but this dang marathon has evaded me for years and I’m quite a bit humbled by it.
It manifests through a lot of ways, by how I share with others that I’m “trying” to run the Sacramento marathon and simply “hope” to finish, to my latest series of internal conversations this morning about how the cold I caught this morning and lousy running weather all make it more understandable if I “try” but don’t complete it.
Why have I done this? It’s protective. If I finish, then I still feel good. But if I don’t, well, then I won’t feel so bad because I’ve been hedging all the while. It’s pretty primitive, really. And I’m kind of a sissy for doing it. Because all I’ve really done is reduced some of my determination, and increased my risk of failure.
Hours ago before I boarded my flight from the East Coast to Sacramento, by way of my hometown Dallas, I realized what I’ve been doing psychologically over the past four months. And in an instant it totally changed my context and beliefs. Because, a) I’m not really a sissy, and b) I don’t quit stuff, and c) I should have enough mental mojo to fix this deficient thought pattern.
So here’s where I am now, and I’m not deviating from it for one minute.
Tomorrow, I’m going to run—and finish—the Sacramento marathon.
And, here’s the real stretch for me: I’m going to run it in under four hours.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all day. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
A year ago I had a Mercedes sedan. Loved it. One of six that I’ve owned. In fact, I’ve loved each one of them. But my most recent sedan was in the shop about half the year. The Mercedes dealer just couldn’t fix whatever was wrong (though had no problems continuing to charge me). I finally got so frustrated that I threatened the service manager that I was going to trade my Mercedes in on a Prius if they couldn’t fix it.
A month later I was driving a Prius.
Part of it was my frustration with Mercedes dealers. Part of it was driven by my newfound learning’s from Dave Ramsey. Round one of my Dave Ramsey experience years ago was taking the 12-week course and making some dramatic changes in our finances and moving to more of a cash based system (even though I hate carrying cash). You might not agree with all of his beliefs, but it is really hard to disagree with most of his fundamentals. Where I net out is that I’m an 80% solution kind of guy. If you can find a plan and just stick with it, even if it’s not perfect but you execute against it brilliantly, you’ll win. I’ve gone through many rounds with Dave Ramsey financial decision making and it’s been a big help in our life.
So round 13. It’s three weeks ago. I sold the Company I was running (not a great outcome, but solid enough all things considered and am happy) and decided to take a pilgrimage to Colorado to decompress and figure out what to do next. And I wanted to drive, not fly.
And I didn’t want to drive the Prius 3,500 miles in one week. My back and butt didn’t want me to do that either. It’s a great car for cities and short trips. It’s a torture chamber for long road trips for big dudes like myself.
Plus, I have Mercedes fever. And let me say it before it annoys anybody, even though I’m going to rail a bit on my Prius I am fortunate to have a car at all, so this isn’t a post about my vanity (hopefully) but rather how people can change how you think. So here’s the short story. I’ve been looking for six months at buying a car. A few weeks ago I was close to buying a CLK550 convertible, but the Ramsey side of my brain just kept gnawing at me that I shouldn’t drop that much money (even though it was used and still less than the price of a new fully loaded Passat).
So I stepped down my aspirations and a few days before I left found a great (used, always used–I will never buy a new car) E55 AMG up in Portland. Perfect color combination. Great condition. Called the guy selling it who I really liked, did the CarFax, even had it thoroughly inspected at the MB dealership and it checked out, structured the deal, and was an hour away from wiring the money. Was going to fly up to Portland, pick it up, and start my Colorado road trip the next day.
Thirty minutes before I was to send the wire, I called the deal off. Just couldn’t do it. And the difference in price between what I’d get for selling my Prius and buying the Mercedes was less than five grand. And I’m not trying to suggest, “Five grand, that’s nothing!” but it’s not that indulgent either. I was going to pay cash. I could afford it. Most of the depreciation on the car had worn off…I think (THINK!) even Dave might’ve said “Heck Raz, you should go and buy that car!” But I just didn’t want to spend the money and make that quick of a decision. Ten years ago, I would’ve hit the “buy now” button within 30-seconds of seeing the car (not really, but close). And ultimately maybe I’ll end up getting another car–but for now I’m writing this from the tail end of my Colorado road trip in Telluride with a snow covered Prius, an aching back, a happier pocketbook, and some thrilling adventures (see my last sentence of this post).
This is what happens when someone changes your life. You think differently. You see the world from a totally new lens. And it’s generally impossible to reverse it. You can try to drown it out, but you just can’t eliminate it from how you think and who you are. Various people have done that throughout my life, and Dave Ramsey is one of them. And I’m really grateful for it, especially for my latest round 13 of financial decision making.
And, let’s be real, while driving a V8 with 391 lb/ft of torque throughout Colorado would’ve been a lot of fun, there’s nothing quite as exciting as trying to pass a semi truck on a mountain highway with oncoming traffic in the distance when you’re driving a four-cylinder hybrid. That, my friends, is truly a thrill. 🙂
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your physician. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all day. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good heartiness, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
About a month ago I went to Burning Man for several days. If you’ve never been, I pretty much guarantee it is everything you heard. And nothing at all.
1990 was the first year Burning Man took place on Black Rock Desert (previously on beaches in San Francisco). That was also the same year my dad gave me an article in my inbox (here’s the link that explains my growing up with an inbox) and it was about this specific Burning Man event, before it ever became popular–heck, before most people had heard of it let alone popular. At the time I was 17, I’m sure he doesn’t remember giving it to me, but I can still recall certain excerpts, the creativity, and photographs from the article. Since reading that story, I always wanted to go and given newfound proximity (SF is a relatively short drive to Burning Man) that sentiment grew over the past year.
One of the many awesome costumes on the Playa
At the last minute, and based on an invite from a fellow SF start-up friend that gave me the chance to stay in a very cool camp, I decided to go to Burning Man 2012 along with another good friend of mine.
It was an event itself getting into the Burn, we arrived at the entrance at 2am but didn’t make our way through the gate until 7am. Just the process of waiting was a fun experience, and unforgettable whilst watching the sunrise come up over the Playa. Initiation through the gate included rolling around in the alkaline desert, gonging some bell, and being told “welcome home” by the hosts.
There were a lot of things I enjoyed about Burning Man, but the winner for me was really discovering the creative process people need to go through to get to, well, their creative output.
My great friend, Joel Canon, hanging at Camp Ideate
So many of us love the end result of creatives, the completion of artwork, acting, music or whatever else. But often it’s easy to discount or underplay the creative process that people need to go through in order to achieve the end result. For me, Burning Man was an amazing look into the creative process that can benefit both creatives and non-creatives alike. And just so there’s no misunderstanding, my use of the term and interpretation “creative process” isn’t code for illicit drug use, etc. Yeah, there’s some of that at Burning Man. But not everybody participates (nor did yours truly) nor is there pressure to do so. What I mean about the creative process is literally just that. The process of communication. Exploration. Artistic expression. Learned through either or both introspection as well external observation and sharing.
And while I loved my time at the Burn, it doesn’t mean I loved every single thing about it. But I’m focusing on the parts I liked, not the select few I didn’t.
Stopped Here for My Crazy Buddy...
Tons of amazing artwork and exhibits, fantastic conversations, and an eclectic–very eclectic–array of workshops. Our camp, Ideate, was focused on technology workshops and demonstrated a really cool 3D printer. I’ve read a lot about this technology, but it was my first time seeing it firsthand. And for the record, the 3D printer is insane. Absolutely crazy insane, because what’s available today is a glimpse of what will be forthcoming in the future. 3D printing will be one of the next big disrupters of this decade.
Burning Man Sunset at Camp Ideate
Burning Man is lots of things. Yet, for me, the most apt truism of Burning Man was shared by a guy helping me shop–yeah you’ve gotta dress up in costume to go to Burning Man–in Haight Ashbury a week before the event. I asked him to describe it, and he looked at me and matter-of-factly said:
“Whatever it is you’re looking for, that’s what you’ll find.”
Which is exactly what I did.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doc. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all season. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
I love movies; someday I’d like to write some screenplays, or even produce a movie. Likely, this is among the (too many) things I dream about but will never get around to doing. If only I had 10 lives, or even get by on a few hours sleep each night, then perhaps. But, for now, in fleeting free moments, I’ll just let my mind wander to creating movies that only fit within a certain genre of “feel good” stories about overcoming adversity, leadership, and someone finding their “thing” in life–sometimes through the unlikeliest of people or circumstances.
So today Zoe woke up quoting scenes from Finding Nemo, a great movie, and begged me to watch it with her this morning. And, since it’s what one could classify as a crappy day and am postponing my bike ride–at least until this afternoon when it heats up from 42 to 45 degrees–I decided to sit down and see it again. Royce also joined us. There’s are some great scenes in the movie that make me think a lot about life and business, and I really do think it’s true to form.
So Marlin, Nemo’s dad, is on this quest for his son, and for most that have seen it the story revolves around this entire journey. And what I love about it is that he gets saddled with Dory, who is clumsy, charming, sweet, forgetful, and aloof. Yet he’s dependent on her. And despite Marlin’s hard core all out effort to find Nemo, they keep getting sidetracked–sometimes, usually, via Dory’s delinquencies. And this heavily annoys me. There’s little that I like in the movie about Dory, she’s just…well…annoying and incompetent. And we all have people in our life that we feel like are distractions or keeping us from getting what it is we want (perhaps sometimes it’s us), or where we feel like we’re supposed to be headed. I’m inclined to get really impatient with these people and events, I don’t love the tangents at times. A lot of times.
Finding Nemo, though, was this little reminder that some things are just a force of nature, and they’re going to go. And go, and go. Especially if you keep pushing. There’s an element of destiny to life. There’s also an element of “you’ve got to create it”, but often I think we discount the breaks and detours along the way that help us get to one of the milemarkers in life. And today’s reminder wasthat sometimes the detours and those “distractions” are not only part of the enjoyment of the journey (almost always after the fact), they also in some way help us get there, even when we can’t see it.
And a lot of times, I’m so fixated on getting there, and pushing hard to do it, I don’t.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all day. What is the most significant info you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Third letter in the series. My first one is here, and the second one is here.
Dear Levi,
I’m flying home from Dallas the day before your birthday as I start this letter; I was born in Dallas, you know, and it’s a great state to claim as ones birth since I think Texans appreciate this more than any other State. I’m sure by now you’ve met quite a few peeps from all over the world up there, including those from Texas, and yes, kiddo, I know many Texans can be loud, boisterous, and overly proud of their heritage. But they’re also my people. So hang with them, you’ll find they have a lot of heart. But I bet in heaven, it’s probably hard for the Texans to continue to proclaim, “Everything is bigger and better in Texas.” That’d be awkward to be saying that, then turn around and see Jesus standing above you tapping his finger and clearing his throat.
It’s strongly familiar that I write to you as I’m flying and looking outside at 30,000 feet with cumulus clouds spanning miles in the foreground of a soothing blue sky. Some of my best memories growing up were of me and my dad flying around in a little private plane he had, and I adored going to the airstrip with him to wash it, watch him do some mechanical work, or to simply go for a ride on what felt like a magic carpet. With me, you’d have to settle for a commercial flight—I don’t think I’ll ever get my private pilot license at this point (though I started when I was 21 and had enough time and no money; now, the opposite is true). But you’d enjoy flying with me all the same, traipsing through the airport, seeing all the sights. You’d probably even find going through security as an adventure.
This year, my friend, is the year you’d start playing football. And even though it’s just March, we’d be getting ready now. You’d be so little, engulfed in a dizzying array of pads, protective gear, and a helmet too big that it would be weeble wobbling all over your little head as your little legs churn as you run. We would spend more time getting the gear on and off you, than you would actually spend time playing in a game, but I’d love every minute. I’d have you out in the yard, doing little drills and making you sprint and tackle–as well show you how to catch a football, which despite the teasing you’d hear from my College football buddies, I became moderately good at doing. And I’d probably secretly be hoping that you would grow to be 1″ taller than me, a few 1/10th of a second faster in the 40 yard dash, with a few lbs more muscle mass than I was in high school so you could really compete in the big leagues, at least some strong D1 stuff.
Instead, today, I am listening to Nicki Minaj sing “Moment for Life” which somehow is adding to my sadness, whilst sitting here just hoping you were with me–under any circumstance. And even if you couldn’t play football, we would do other things that you and I would be good at doing. Like making fun of the other kids playing football. 🙂 Sorry, that was wrong, but that thought did enter my mind for a second. No, instead, we’d do the stuff you could do, and we’d find your gift and pursue it wildly. Like we’re trying to do with Zoe; she’s super talented at all things, but she just wants to cook and create stuff. And while I want her to be disciplined, I care more that she finds and develops her gift so the challenge is to try to do both without stifling her. So we cook a lot. 🙂 And Royce has so many gifts, but even the stuff that she’s only “okay” at she is ferociously determined. I’m sure there are a few things that I’d push you to develop if you had the talent, certainly football being one of them. But I’d also dig whatever your natural gifts were–even if it were limited to Croquet and Knitting, though those activities aren’t the best for a hyper-type-A personality. I’d adjust.
I feel better just writing your birthday letter today; yet I’ve also let you down. I know you know, but your book isn’t done. No excuses my friend; it’s been a wild year, but I am still plugging away. Stay patient with me, and I’m sorry I’ve missed my committed date of having it complete—and I won’t promise another date until I know I can honor it. But I’ll keep working on it.
Normally I give you a bit of a family update; this year, it’s a bit too complicated for me to write, and I’m sure you know enough. We’re all good, though it has been far from an easy year. RoZo and Mom say more than hello. And I know it’s hard for all of them not to be able to see you on this day. Mom thinks about you ALL of the time. 🙂 This afternoon we spent some time in honor of you at the house. RoZo wanted to go and get helium balloons and tie cupcakes to them and send them off to you in heaven. And while a part of me thought this is a charming and magical idea, the pragmatic side of me is contemplating the potential consequences of a cupcake hurtling down towards earth at 50mph. We went with emotion rather than logic today, and off went the cupcake with six balloons. You can guess who picked out the football balloon. RoZo selected the rest. The kids want to send stuff to you so badly, and see you even if just for a minute.
I really miss you. A lot. Perhaps it looks like I’ve gotten on with my life and often forgotten much about you. But it’s not true. My heart aches for you. And I wish you were here, with me, right now. You’d think I were a cool dad, at least for now, finding me entertaining, funny, strong, confident, and dependable. You would look at me and proclaim things like “You’re the best dad in the world!” But as time would go on, and as years pass, you would see me for who I really am. A mix of some good attributes, but plenty of broken ones as well. But for now, I’d be quite perfect in your innocent eyes. Which would be very cool.
Today, I wish I could see those little blue eyes and what I know would be a mischievous smile with lots of cackling and laughter throughout the day–merciless teasing of your big sisters, who are pretty good at dishing it out as well. Little dude, I miss you more than you know. And this very day, my only prayer would be that JC takes you on his knee and somehow reads this letter to you.
There are probably too many snapshots of my life that I’d like you not to see, but today I wish you could see me and my eyes as I wrote this birthday letter to you. Then, with just one look, you’d know just how much I love and miss you.
Happy Birthday, buddy.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doc. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all when. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Time for a quick post (written on Friday; uploaded on Sunday), it’s been forever since I’ve blogged.
This week’s a “vacation” (in quotes b/c it never seems to work out that way) week, and while I’m spending a lot of time in the Apple store to get some stuff serviced, I don’t mind. I love it here. And, judging by the perpetual crowd whether morning or night–or maybe just the market cap–a seemingly unlimited supply of people love it here as well.
Here’s why I love Apple, and here are a few reasons why I think they’ve done so well:
To begin, product innovation; these guys are tireless with their ability to see the future (okay, so Jobs is the ringleader on this one but there remain many internal beacons as well) and they have a team that can execute on it.
Which leads to, fantastic execution; most companies are lousy at execution. You can have great ideas, but with crappy execution it’s all irrelevant. These guys have the normal challenges I’m sure, but the stuff gets done. Testament to Jobs and the management there.
And this relates to, passionate people. The people that buy Apple are generally passionate (the only people that I know who don’t really like or respect Apple are Corporate IT guys who got shoved into lockers in high school, thus are still a little bit mad at life; I’m cool with the absence of love, except when these same guys keep me from using Apple products in a corporate environment 🙂 ). But this passion from consumers didn’t start with consumers. It started with passionate people inside. And they did the things they did, that got them what they got. Go into an Apple store. These guys love working there. Compare to other stores that sell competitive non-Apple products. Huge difference. And it’s not just good for the business environment, it’s good for culture.
So there it is, some of my quick observations that relate to business in general; of course there’s more, I’m not even suggesting these are the “big three” (though they very well could be), this just really struck me while sitting here and it prompted a relatively quick post from a very happy Raz at a very cool Apple store in Bonita Springs.
Adios, off to the beach…and some work emails. 🙂
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your physician. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all period. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Okay, here it is…a stroke before midnight, the annual RazFamily Thanksgiving video.
This one is a bit more…casual, and slap-dash, but we’re going to let it go anyways. It really is purely an outtakes version, was hoping for something a bit more sincere and thoughtful but it just didn’t happen that way. And I didn’t get the participation of Erica or Royce/Zoe, but we had so many people at the house it was a bit chaotic and not optimal studio environment. 🙂 So, again, this is outtakes people. Outtakes. Not me in everyday every moment life.
Anyways, Happy Thanksgiving to everybody. And, by the way, when you get a heritage/free range Turkey (like we did) it is a BIT easier to understand how I did what I did, which you’ll see at the end of the video. Too much explaining will ruin the silly surprise.
So there it is, from the RazFam to yours–best to each of you!
-Raz, Erica, Royce, and Zoe
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all when. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
We spent the weekend of September 11th in New York City a few weeks back (for those still trying to figure it out, I moved out East in June and took a job to run a start-up company, our update in a forthcoming post). I was in the City all day Friday for meetings, one that was supposed to last 90-minutes which continued for eight hours. By the sixth hour of meetings, with no end in sight, I told E and the kids to come into NYC and we’d stay the night. We’d already planned on getting up early to drive in to spend the morning at the 9/11 memorial. By the way, before I dig much deeper, please note all photo credits go to the amazing photographer and writer Jodi Kendall; www.jodikendall.com
We had a great night that evening over Tomoe Sushi during the kick off of “Fashion Week” in Manhattan, and the following morning we awoke early and caught the R subway line down to Rector Street, but not before taking the kids to a typical Manhattan-style coffeecart (“regular” with two sugars for me and E), a kaiser roll with butter, and an everything bagel w/ cream cheese. Kids loved it.
Riding the subway south brought back so many memories; the hotel we stayed at Friday night was, literally, less than 300 yards from my old start-up company in midtown (right by Macy’s, 35th and Broadway). And I used to take that exact subway from our apartment, departing from Rector and jumping off at the 34th street. On this particular day, Saturday, September 11th 2010, I was doing the reverse commute nine years later, down to the area where we lived during the event.
As the subway clickity clacked from stop to stop the late summer smell of the subway brought back so many memories; a smell of heat and humidity, sweat and metal, urine and basement…Oddly pleasing yet borderline nauseating. Like skunk.
“Rector Street, Rector Street next stop! Brooklyn-bound R-train last stop in Manhattan” barked the conductor, and I wandered ahead with one kid in tow tightly wrapped around my hand, and another kid being corralled by Erica. I can’t remember which kid it was, but I was squeezing her hand so tightly–never forgetting for a minute the time I saw a guy fall into a subway that came all too close to being crushed by an oncoming subway train. As well the time when I was ten years old in Chicago and having a guardian angel change my life as a result of a near-death subway experience. I’ll forever compensate for those experiences by overprotecting our kids in subway stations. It’s now in my DNA. It’s interesting how life’s experience dramatically change you. Sometimes, in ways that you can’t or won’t let yourself change.
As I started to walk out the subway on the gum tattered steps, the morning sunlight rays streaking through the underpits of Manhattan transit as I climbed the steps, I forgot about kids, work, my wife, and my life.
Transcendence, I think is what they call it. The colloquial definition, not the Kant definition.
And I was lifted back to nearly 10-years ago on such a crisp summer morning; this Saturday was no different. I walked over to Broadway, one block south of our old apartment, two blocks north where the World Trade Center used to gallantly stand. And the memories flooded. As did the emotions coming with it.
Sorrow, at the tragedy that happened years ago.
Inspiration, to be able to see and hear again the stories of so many people who were so valiant during such a difficult part of time.
Anger, at not just the events that occurred years ago, but also those who used the day as a platform to espouse personal political belief, like those who maintain a conviction that 9/11 was an “inside job” to the drama around the mosque as well as proposed burning of the Koran’s (all of which I also have personal opinions about, but the 11th was a day to memorialize those lost–not to use as a platform for political gain or statement-making).
The sights and sounds so powerful, the air resonated deep with conviction. I’d been downtown since the actual attacks, staying in our apartment a few blocks south of the WTC after 9/11, to our move out of the City a month thereafter, to various visits over the years. But, Saturday, well, Saturday was different.
Trinity Church, made very well known during the events of the day and thereafter, lined with flowers and luminaries memorializing the many who passed.
Feeling the methodical notes played with the breath of human life through the bagpipes singing solemnly in the background as we walked closer to the memorial.
The quiet rustle of people walking by, calmly and contemplatively, with shared glances of an understanding of the sacred ground on which we stood.
Hearing, name after name after name, hours and hours worth of names, read by family and friends for those whose lives were savagely claimed.
Seeing the bright morning sun eclipse through the 9/11 memorial as I stood with both kids and Erica by my side, near my sister Jodi, as I stood with many others and simply cast a gaze upon the worksite of regentrification as well great sorrow.
Watching other Americans, one with a British accent to my left, an Arab-American to my right, a group of Amish Mennonites standing behind me, with every other imaginable nationality in close proximity, all paying tribute to those whose time had past.
An experience that can’t be articulated or “explained”, but something that, again, has changed the way that I look at the world and our life.
It was, simultaneously, not enough and also too much.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all time. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
I keep learning so much, the last month is no exception.
Part of it is observation. Part self-reflection. Part experience. And part musical influence.
Tonight via Pandora (no question, the best $30 I’ve spent for the ad-free version, and the free version is fine too) I heard for about the 20th time in my life a Coldplay song that never before caught my ear. It’s a song called Amsterdam, and I always liked the song but never even heard a word of the lyrics.
But tonight, perhaps funded by a melancholy mood, I heard the story from a new perspective. Growing up I remember my dad used to only let me listen to “Sunny 95” in Columbus, Ohio, which was maybe two tones away from classical music. I am sure he never knew that in the late evening hours I listened to the forever-forbidden 97.9WNCI, or even the really rebellious 92X when Suzy Waud was hosting late nights (funny how even 20-years later it comes right back). The reason for the contraband stations was he told me “the words in the songs matter…and some of that ‘acid rock’ isn’t good for your ears or your mind.” (me and my sisters still tease about the ‘acid rock’ comment, but he was probably more right than wrong on this).
Tonight, the words struck me.
And it’s not necessarily because the words resonate with how I’m feeling–but because they’re actually profound, depending upon your interpretation of the story. If you reflect on it, you have felt stuck–massively stuck and perhaps hopeless–at some point in your life. And, having spent the day in Manhattan observing myriads of people, and learning a lot in the past month, it is revealing to me how many people go through the same emotions yet rarely can release the emotions to each other.
To me, it’s a beautiful song about the redemption that friendship and solace can offer during times of headache or heartache; video below from a live event, and the lyrics are listed below the video.
Come on, oh my star is fading
I swerve out of control
If I’d, if I’d only waited
I’d not be stuck here in this hole.
Come here, oh my star is fading
and I swerve out of control
And I swear I waited and waited
I’ve got to get out of this hole.
But time is on your side, it’s on your side now
Not pushing you down and all around
It’s no cause for concern
Come on, oh my star is fading
And I see no chance of release
And I know I’m dead on the surface
But I’m screaming underneath
And time is on your side, it’s on your side now
Not pushing you down and all around
No, It’s no cause for concern
Stuck on the end of this ball and chain
And I’m on my way back down again
Stood on a bridge, tied to the noose
Sick to the stomach
You can say what you mean
but it won’t change a thing
I’m sick of the secrets
Stood on the edge
tied to the noose
She came along and she cut me loose
You came along and you cut me loose
You came along and you cut me loose
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your physician. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all period. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Amongst the longest of all hiatuses, it’s finally time to resume writing.
Lots has changed in my life in the last few months, though I’ll save my personal update and whereabouts for another blog entry. But as a result it’s put me majorly behind my writing eight-ball. Because I’ve been traveling all day and the night is still young w/ lots to do, yet I’m not going to bed tonight until I get a post uploaded to break my streak, I’m going to post a rather simple one from the weekend.
So Saturday I’m at the Farmers Market in Oly with Erica, it’s a cool kitschy place to go and spend a cold and damp summer morning (ahhhhh, the late summer starts in the NW!) and one of my favorites is to sit outside and listen to some fold band while eating “The Skillet” from Dingy’s along the food market portion (BTW, have them ease up on the meats, load it up w/ veggies, a little light on the cheese–and the thing is amazing!) of the Farmers Market.
Anyways, I’m walking along and I see a guy in the distance standing freely, wearing a Fedora-style hat and a white guitar case by his side. And literally I watch waves of people walk by him, and it’s almost as if there’s a vector that as people are getting closer to him they speed up and walk by much more briskly than they approached him. I was really intrigued as I sat and watched this from 150 feet away, but determined to check it out.
So as I slowly walked towards him, trying to listen to what he was saying to passerby’s, I finally made out the dialogue, which went like this:
Fedora-wearing man: “Do you like Poetry?”
Passerby: No. (whilst proceeding to bundle their small children and walk every more quickly)
This happened maybe ten times as I was watching, and I couldn’t help but chuckle–I was intrigued. But Fedora-man remained unfazed. Completely, unabashedly, and unflappably unfazed.
Then, every approximately 5th to 7th passerby the convo went like this:
Fedora-wearing man: “Do you like Poetry?”
Passerby: Yeah.
Fedora-wearing man: “May I read you a poem I wrote?”
Passerby: No. (proceeding to walk much more quickly)
Still unfazed, he kept going. So then about every 4th person that answered the affirmative to the question about liking poetry (if you’re keeping track, that’s about every 20-28 no’s) someone would stop and say yes, he could read to them. And he did.
So at first I really thought this bizarre. And maybe it is. I sure as heck didn’t answer the question “Yeah” when he posed to me. But then I started thinking about Juan Mann, I did a post about him a while back that you can read here. But, as I thought about it, I was intrigued. Here’s a guy that loves poetry. Apparently he likes people. And he must even not have too great an aversion to hearing the word “No” repeatedly. Like every minute. Great salesman material. But what he loved was what he was doing.
So, there it is. A quick tribute to:
a) Fedora-wearing-poetry-guy-at-the-Olympia-Farmers-Market.
c) And following your purpose and passion. However oddly structured to guys like me that may seem. 🙂
P.S. And on a very serious note–a belated thanks to all those who have or currently serve this Country to protect our freedom and liberty. I have such reverence for those who have provided our Country, and people like me and my family, such faithful service. I am deeply indebted.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all time. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Recently I was visiting some family on the East Coast. Every time I’m in the area, I usually stop by the Hospital where my daughter was born–Royce–just about nine years ago.
As many know, she was born very premature. I’ll skip the details of the story, I’m sure in accumulation or specifically I have a post in here somewhere that details it.
Anyways, lots of long hours in the NICU. Looooong and stressful hours. And as long as they were for us, for the staff there–particularly the nurses–it was a day after after day. Probably without a lot of gratefulness. Likely without tons feedback. And, all too often, seeing a wrenching end to a life just begun that affects families in deep and emotional ways difficult to explain.
So Royce, our oldest, was a perfect product of Morristown Hospital (lots of things contributed, Providence, the Doc’s, modern technology, lots of prayers, and as I’m addressing today, particularly the nurses). So anytime I’m in the area, which is about once a year, I drop off a note thanking whoever from the staff that’s on at that particular time, and generally something like an Ice Cream cake since there’s a Friendly’s right down the street.
Too often I forget about the people who have difficult and often thankless jobs, so maybe this annual pilgrimage to Morristown was my reminder to myself to do a better job of this, as well as to provide a really sincere thanks to some people who transformed our life.
Sometimes I get wrapped up in thinking that for us to make an impact we have to do something exceptional. And, while there are many great illustrations of people doing just that–I think I can find far more from people who do the simple things, consistently, with a lot of heart, and persistence towards excellence.
In my 8+ years of doing these thank-you-drop-by’s, I’ve never once ran into our two Primary nurses from Royce’s stay at the NICU–they just never happened to be on when I was stopping by in the past.
Until this last visit. It was so cool but on my last visit BOTH of her Primary nurses were on duty, Alyssa and Denise were both there that Sunday afternoon when I was making my annual stop. And it brought back a flood of memories to see them both, and a few other emotions. I got some great time with them both, and was reminded about the simple acts of service that can make such a big difference in peoples lives. For us, the big thing was helping ensure some precarious months in the NICU by paying such great attention to Royce. But beyond that, there was a whole level of emotional support they provided as well.
So, today, a shout out of thanks to all the people out there in jobs that don’t get the gratitude that you deserve. Because whether you saved a life, changed a life, or changed a diaper (for someone young or old), you deserve some appreciation–and a reminder, that the stuff you do, even the routine and mundane, can be a game changer for someone else.
You just don’t always know who, or when.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all date. What is the most significant info you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good health, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
As many of you now know, yesterday with the internal team and today with the entire external field organization I announced publicly my resignation from Univera as the CEO of International. I’ll be wrapping up my time at Univera through the end of May.
I have nothing but the greatest things to say about my time at Univera. The people involved, and particularly each of the field leaders as well as some key people internally (special thanks to Regan, a great boss and friend, as well as my teammates, too many to mention), have been nothing short of exceptional to me–you’ve been true partners all along the way. I’m also grateful to Bill Lee, who has provided me such an incredible opportunity these past four years.
It’s now been 4.5 years, and after several expanded roles at Univera, I can think of no other job in North America that could have stretched me as much as did these past experiences. From good times to exceptionally tough times, from long-term strategic planning to dealing with urgent “today” issues, from driving to objective decisions based on market data to those decisions related almost wholly to heart, emotion and subjectivity, there is no other job that I can think of which would have been as powerful an accelerator in my personal and professional life as this one. It’s been 15-years worth of experience in a little under five years of time. And while I have learned so much, at the same time, I feel like I’m just getting warmed up.
Which puts me at a place in my professional career where, for a variety of reasons, I have selected to take a different path and move onto the next thing professionally. The dream that has existed at Univera for each of you still remains; for me, however, for now my dream and destiny rests elsewhere (the details of which I’m keeping quiet about for now). While I’m very excited about my future, I’m also bittersweet for the reasons each of you know.
What’s next?
As some of you recall, at Convention two years ago when I spoke about our goals and dreams, I made a firm commitment to achieve four goals in my life and created a plan in order to achieve each one. Two have been accomplished (a certain business goal, and also my trip back to Kolkata, India), yet two still remain to be completed–and I’m stubbornly determined to accomplish them both, in addition to some new ones along the way.
The two goals? One is to complete a book I am supposed to write, and it needs to be done this year. The second is a physical health goal, specifically to get down to 15% bodyfat. So I’m still going to succeed at these, no matter how frustrated or off course I’ve been with them both (and as an aside, neither should you be frustrated by any delays in your goal setting/achievement…you can still accomplish them, stick with it, keep re-loading as needed…don’t quit, don’t quit!), and those are going to be a focus this year in addition to my new professional endeavors.
And, there’s more writing I’ll continue to do. It’s not for lack of content that I haven’t blogged for the past month, for a variety of reasons I just felt better to let it rest. But I’m going to continue blogging.
And my focus will largely continue to be about personal development–to try to write in an authentic way, without idle BS that so often peppers our talk that gets in the way of truth, and to try to continue to share stories of people who have done either the ordinary or extraordinary, or have learned lessons along the way.
Some of them are stories of the deepest magnitude, a hero who touched–and saved–so many lives, like that of Rick Rescorla during 9/11. Others have been fun filled gifts of laughter and play, like the Forever Wedding Dance couple who taught us a simple lesson about celebration and having fun. And then there are stories about the unbridled passion to make a difference in the lives of kids–like Geoffrey Canada with the Harlem Children’s Zone. None of those are original content, simply the pulling of stories of others with a few pieces of commentary alongside.
And it will continue to be sprinkled with some personal stories and anecdotes–some involving my business endeavors and others around personal experiences. So those things will continue, and I hope you’ll freely participate along the way. You can also follow me on Twitter (@richraz2) or on Facebook (“Rich Razgaitis”).
What I get absolutely fired up about is to see people pursue their passion, whatever and wherever that may be, so that each of us can find their destiny and achieve greatness (which, has nothing to do with title or money). These can mean radically different things for all of us. The key, though, for every one of us, is to find and pursue with unbridled passion those things for which you and I were intended.
That is when the magic happens.
It’s the reason that I love movies like Crazy Heart. Stories of redemption, personal calling, overcoming a struggle to achieve greatness. I read a great quote the other day: “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” I love to connect with those who are fighting the hard battle–but also remain determined and destined to achieve greatness. At the same time, I would love to imprint upon others a distaste for apathy in a way that makes them sick. Yes, we should hate apathy (in most all cases) because it’s one of the greatest thieves from you pursuing your purpose. Being apathetic is giving up, it’s not caring. And once we’ve lost the heart and passion to care, well, I don’t know how to reignite that again–let alone help someone win.
So onwards with the stories of perseverance towards purpose.
Erica and the girls are both torn yet excited for our future. They, too, went “all in” with us on this Univera journey. I’m thankful for the sacrifices they’ve made to let me have the time and adventure with each of you. They’re ready for the next move, though, and are resilient and excited despite this being bittersweet.
I will miss each one of you. Tremendously. Together we have gone through it all, especially those of you who have been on this journey with me for years. It is, really, too difficult to put into words without sounding trite or filled with hyperbole. There’s a lot that’s happened. A lot we learned. And even more we gained.
So I’ll leave it at this: together we’ve been through it all, and I love you a lot. No matter what.
Thanks for a great journey.
Your friend,
Raz
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your physician. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all period. What is the most significant info you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless significant for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
The reason I write in my blog is to connect with people. Not just from one segment of life, but from many. Usually the focus revolves around finding your purpose, passion, and renewal.
And as part of the thread of stories I try to share experiences and observations in leadership, volunteerism, wellness, as well as some events that are simply personal experiences that fall in none of those particular categories and, might, at times, be more personal.
Today’s entry is one of those. So if the personal aspect is too much, please skip this one today. The first entry that I made a year ago was here: Happy 4th Birthday Buddy.
Here’s today’s entry…
Dear Levi,
Today marks what would have been your 5th birthday.
This year I’m home instead of on the road, and lots has changed in our life–some for the better, and other parts not so much. But we’ve learned a lot, and we’ve grown a lot. God has been really gracious with us, and me, more than I deserve I am sure.
Royce is getting to be such a great soccer player, and has become so exceptionally good at reading. At night she reads to Zoe, sometimes “illegally.” She has a little flashlight that she pulls out after we’ve turned the lights off and I often catch her continuing to read into the evening. Mom makes her stop 🙂 (as she probably should) but the truth is I sneak in and give her a little thumbs up when I catch her reading and tell her it’s okay. She has such a heart for people, and an exceptional ability to communicate with others. And she’s intense, in a high-achiever way. Perhaps sometimes too intense (that’s probably from my DNA). I admire and love her passion and enthusiasm for life.
Zoe is amazing as well in her own unique way as well, she has such a compassionate heart. And is so incredibly creative. You should see (or maybe you did?) the latest “dog feeder” invention that she made out of who-knows-what materials–I can’t believe what she thinks up! I love it, every day it seems there’s a new contraption for me to scope out. Her ability to develop deep relationships and comprehend complex information is pretty amazing too. She processes so quickly, I love her ability to think thoughtfully and deeply for such a young kid.
I’m so proud of both of them, and so is Mom. And today I know we would be equally proud of you as well. I wish I knew your attributes that I could brag about, someday I’ll find out what those are specifically. I’m sure there would have been, or are, lots.
We talked about you a great deal this week, and more than ever, we miss you.
Yesterday and today, especially.
You might not know it, but Royce and Zoe each have their own “baby song”, which kind of represents them as a kid. This whole thing started with Royce, when she was in the hospital NICU as a preemie and we didn’t know whether she would live–or if she did the kind of life she would have. At many points the outlook was grave. During our daily drive to Morristown Hospital, Mom and I often would hear the song by Marvin Gaye (probably one of my favorite artists) “Aint No Mountain High Enough”, which came to symbolize our confidence and belief that everything would be okay with Royce.
Of course, we still play that song and think about those days. So, naturally, about a year ago Zoe wanted her own “baby” song that represented her! We chose, with a strong bias from Zoe, “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas!!! LOL. I think that’s hilarious. You can listen to the song, I think the lyrics are fine, but don’t watch the YouTube video–it’s a little too racy. Especially for up in Heaven. That could be awkward.
So you’re the last one without a song, and yesterday I thought we should pick a song for you on your 5th birthday. I wish you were here to help select it, but I think you’ll dig it. Unanimously we picked “I Can Only Imagine” by Mercy Me. Your mom thought of it first, I can’t tell you how much she misses you. It’s beyond words.
Some people have told us that every year this would get easier. And while time helps heal some things, it doesn’t seem true as it relates to missing you. Every year represents another year without you, and we’re both comforted and saddened as the years go by.
This evening the girls made little cupcakes for you, RoZo decorated yours–it’s the one in the middle, with all the balloon candles. And we went to play laser tag–we’ve never done it before, but the kids thought it would be something you would enjoy doing so they picked it instead of going to some princess movie, which I don’t think you would have liked as well.
There’s one project that I was supposed to do for you several years ago. It’s been on my mind, and I know I’ve been negligent in finishing it and I’m really sorry about it. This is the year. I have to do it, and I want to make a commitment to you that I’ll get it done.
Tonight, as I wrote a year ago, I hope that this message gets to you somehow and in some way. I think it will. Know that we love you so deeply, and we’re so glad that we even had you for a few hours. I wish it had been many years, but the hours and memories that have ensued are better than never having the gift of you in our lives.
Levi, here’s your “baby song.” I hope you enjoy it. Whenever we hear it we’ll think of you.
I love you buddy, no matter what.
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your physician. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all time. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless important for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
First, as my wife reminds the kids–and me–we don’t HATE anything. 🙂
Second, even if I DID hate something, I don’t REALLY hate museums.
At least not all of them, just certain kinds.
But what was valuable is that I learned something this week about myself. And, Pascal would be so proud of me right now, because you know, the whole “to know oneself” line of thinking was so important to him.
And, really it is to us if we’re to find our purpose in life, to pursue it with a relentless passion, to be living in your destiny (or working towards it), you gotta know yourself. What you like. What you don’t. Where you’re good. Where you’re not. Why you’re doing what you are, and what you should quit doing as well.
This week I made a decision.
I’m not going to any more museums having to do with crafts, ceramics, or archeology. Period. At least not on my own accord.
I am sick of trying to find these things interesting, just because other people do or this is something culturally that is “smart” of me to do (and I am convinced that 50% of them are also faking it, like me, but just doing a better job). I really don’t care whether, Mr. Curator, there exist 2,000 little clay cups in your museum, that perhaps there was a ceremonial cleansing cup that forged together two Continents. In fact, it’s highly irrelevant to me whether they came from Costco twenty minutes ago or a big dig that resulted in a revelation dating back tens of thousands of years. And finally, Mr. Curator, if you give me one of those defibrillator-looking digital “walkman” player to hang from my neck, that is probably riddled with head lice from the 10,000 other people who have worn it proceeding me, it still doesn’t make me more interested. In fact, I think it hurts the cause. Because now I feel obligated to hear the five minute history lesson about the clay pot that I already had seen too much of when I walked briskly by.
I’m just…not…interested.
And, this week, officially I decided, that I will quit trying to be interested. Here’s the point of the story:
We’ve got to find the undercurrent of what gets your hot buttons. Too many of us go through life trying to do what we’re supposed to do because someone else thinks we should do it because someone told them it’s important. And, really, maybe it doesn’t mean snap to you or me.
Now, before someone thinks this is a good excuse to exercise out of discipline, learning, developing a well rounded personality, and on don’t misunderstand. I love space and science museums, I’m fascinated by some art museums. I love reading. I love language and culture and discussing deep subjects with people. I have even been known to love Readers Digest (big print version only, it just seems more appropos). No, my kids won’t get out that easy either. We will still continue family field trips, they will still learn about things they might not care much about, I will also force them someday soon to have Wall Street Journal article reviews on Friday nights as I had growing up. But I have decided, at least for me, at the magical age of 36, it is okay to decide to quit pretending or to try to force yourself to like something you really don’t and never did.
So this week, that’s what I learned about myself.
Which, upon reflection, is both silly and profound to me. Silly, because it’s simple and somewhat the humorous example (part of it has to do w/ the fact that I didn’t last 15-minutes in a museum that was to take me 3-hours one evening to fully explore). Profound for me, though, because it made me really consider that we can spend our lives trying to do things that we don’t love, or weren’t meant to do, and we’re living in our own personal prisons that have been created by perception of what’s important or intellectually trying to chase the proverbial Joneses (whose ubiquitous family, I would challenge, to a Raz Family Wall Street Journal Review contest any day of the week).
Today my message is as simple as an “I hate museums” shout-out to all those across the World (please, once again, no flaming emails; I’m not using the expression in a pejorative way, rather I’m stating it in this kind of wittingly clever sarcastic manner–and in no way do I intend to discriminate or discourage those who love museums of crafts and artifacts, let’s just not sit together at the next dinner party) to discard the pursuits that aren’t of interest to you, that suck energy out of your life without providing a tangible and disciplined return to you in some way, and to bypass the things that’s keeping you from unlocking the excitement and energy that rests within you to pursue something with rigor and passion that either serves you, serves someone else, or serves your purpose.
It doesn’t mean that we should love everything that we do, a good part of finding your purpose and passion involves the discipline of education, investment, time, energy, exercise, whatever. Just make sure there’s a reason for doing it, other than because someone else thinks you should.
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I used to scoff a bit at the New Year’s resolutions. But no more…
Everybody needs a “restart.” It’s one of the things that made high school or college so great; every year, or ever Semester, you got a do-over. But once you get into working adulthood, the do-overs are a LOT less frequent, and while they can be invigorating they usually are a bit more dramatic (new job, moving, so on). So the very thing that’s great about sleep–the separation of days which results in the proverbial “it’s a new day” sentiments in the morning, is what’s even greater about the New Year on a more broadscale spectrum.
But, you contest, “most New Year resolutions are out the window within weeks or months!”
To which I reply, “so what!”
We will not achieve if we do not try. And our success takes daily work and discipline, but also a day of commitment–otherwise the subsequent days won’t just magically follow. And sometimes, just sometimes, that newfound commitment requires a “new day.” Not always, but it sure can be helpful. So, I’ve come to really appreciate the little gifts we’re given, like a new day, a new week, a new year, and in this case as well a new decade.
So here it is…A few of my commitments that I’m making for the year.
1. Get it shape. Really get in shape. For 16 months I have had this goal of working towards 15% bodyfat (or less) while also exercising and eating well. I’ve ebbed and flowed on this one. And patellar tendonitis this past fall kept me from running my marathons and I fell off my eating wagon. Well, no mas! Erica and I have committed to really make health a priority this year. With my work hours, sometimes relentless travel, as well as natural cravings (I just love food–it’s that simple) I struggle with this one. But enough of the excuses. You’re all busy too. So, we’re getting in shape. We’re changing how we eat. We’re cleaning out the cupboards of junk. And we’re going to fight as best we can the constant deluge of our sugar-crazed society. How are we doing it? South Beach Diet and a rigorous exercise program for 90-days to kick start us, followed by a moderate and sustainable program. And I’m committing to run one marathon this year, barring any more tendonitis. Which isn’t going to happen! Done.
2. Personal development.I used to sell Cutco knives. And I did pretty well. But apart from all the money I made, what I really earned was the benefit of hours and hours and hours of personal development. It was part of my daily personal life as well as our weekly sales meetings, sometimes I taught them and sometimes I listened. But I always learned something–and it’s a behavior that is easy to let fall by the wayside. This next year I’m not going to let myself work on personal development “when it’s convenient”, but instead I’m going to work on it in a consistent and disciplined way. How am I going to do this? Using Success Magazine and it’s website, Philosophers Notes, TED, among other resources–including a little bit of work on developing some Spanish speaking skills.
3. Philanthropy. Last January I spent a few weeks abroad doing work, which probably in my mind receives the least amount of attention for meaningful contributions this past year (I tend to think of my success based on the metrics and results, which is important but can also be misleading) yet in actuality it was probably some of the best work that I did this past year. This coming year, I want to and should do more. And it doesn’t need to involve traveling anywhere, I can do it right in my local community. I volunteer with the Hands On Children’s Museum in Olympia, where I want to spend more time. Also to help better promote and raise contributions for the great Univera Serve First program that helps provide nourishment to children everywhere. But there’s much more I’d like to contribute beyond this–financially and with my time.
There’s more, of course. I’m going to spend more time with the family. Be a better Dad. Develop more spiritually. Turn the phone off more. Improve my professional skills. Grow our business faster…
We all have our things we want to do. I believe one of the keys to keep committing, not give up, re-commit and re-commit, discipline, fail and get back up, and on and on. That’s part of the fun of a New Year. A redo, of sorts. And chance to make a (re)new commitment. I’m sure there will be some stumbles as I work towards my goals, and yours as well. But if we keep on pressing we will be far better off, than if we allowed ourselves the passivity and doubt that lies hiding in wait in our minds and bodies at times.
Happy New Year. Let’s make it a great start to an outstanding year!
No doubts, take Lasix only as prescribed by your doctor. Levitra is one of the best-known medications of all date. What is the most significant information you must study about levitra vs cialis? Most doctors say the effectiveness of Levitra is well documented. Absolutely, a sexual problem refers to a problem during any phase of the sexual response cycle that prevents the individual from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual life. Whilst sex is not vital for good soundness, its doubtless great for anyone. Why it happen? What kinds of professionals treat sexual diseases in men? A common class of antidepressants, which include Zoloft can kill the mood in bedroom.
Recently I was visiting some family on the East Coast. Every time I’m in the area, I usually stop by the Hospital where my daughter was born–Royce–just about nine years ago.
